Wednesday, 2 March 2016

Away From The Past

                      Running From The Past


Little did I know after many years pass that
My past would come haunting me. 
never realized that the very past I've been fleeing from would catch up which somehow makes me feel like I've been wrong all my life. 

I lost you on the long run.The only one I ever truely love thinking that someday you might be a story from the past but guess I was wrong. 
You still living in my thoughts of every day. 
In my future dreams and memories of what we used to be. 

For so long I've wanted to reconcile with that past for my happiest moments are of what we both had and feels like you still have a role to play along this journey of life.

When I first met you. There was this ignition in me. 
Something that made me have this feeling for the first time. 
That's when I realized that at some point in life we were meant to meet. 
It wasn't by chance or coincidence when it happened.

That feeling when you smiled at me. 
Despite us being strangers. 
Despite the urge to admire. 
I couldn't maintain eye contact with every time our eyes met. 
We both looked at opposite direction.
A chemistry reaction was taking place. Not only in my mind but body and soul. 

The bulbing feeling of butterflies in my stomach. 
The increased heart beat rate.The chilly feeling you gave me when you looked me in the eyes.

All my courage faded away with just the thought of saying Hi.
When I finally did.
There was this feeling of achievement in me, Call it the eureka kind of feeling followed by a massive confusion.

I couldn't think of what to say next. 
When you smiled. 
You got me hypnotized and I couldn't help it but smile back not sure if it was Me you were smiling at.
For days it bothered me and nights I dreamt of that very moment. 
From then I knew you were not just a stranger to be.

After month made me realize running away from my past is all am ever doing, 
Worse it's not something that am good at for I don't know what to do next.

You follow me to my present and my future. 
I can't get you of my mind. 

Guess after all there's no running away from you.
The fear of what if the moment I stop running becomes the moment my life come's to an end still follows me in and out of my bed.
I realized you can never run away from the past.